What is Laid Back Parenting?

The Plethora of Parenting Styles

Especially if you are on social media, you have likely heard about all sorts of different parenting styles. From Tiger Moms to Almond Moms, Helicopter Parents to Lawnmower Parents, it seems there is always a new way to categorize parental tendencies. Now, you may be hearing some buzz about laid back parenting. What is this parenting style? Might it be a good fit for you and your children?

The Basics of Laid Back Parenting

Let’s be clear: we all want to be good parents. Parenting can be challenging, and it is always an adventure, but at the end of the day, we are all out to raise healthy, happy, successful individuals. It’s just how we go about achieving this goal that differs. For laid back parents, the focus is on guiding without controlling. Understanding that it is not really possible to have complete control over another person, laid back parents let go of that idea, and let their children go. This may mean letting a child pursue interests without weighing in, or letting a child make mistakes and even fail, in the interest of learning how to succeed. In the toddler years, it means letting a child who is learning to walk take a few tumbles. In the teen years, it is about stepping back and letting your kids make big decisions without telling them what to do.

What Laid Back Parenting is Not

One thing that laid back parenting is absolutely not is lazy. In fact, it can be extremely challenging not to jump in and save the day if you see your child beginning to make a wrong term. Laid back parents don’t set children loose without a safety net. They make it clear that they are there if the child needs help. The difference between laid back parents and parents who use some other types of parenting is that laid back parents give their children the room to make their own choices, while also offering grace for mistakes. This results in a parent-child relationship built on trust, where the kids know that they can confide in their parents, and that their parents’ approval is not based on their success or failure. It is a difficult balance to strike, guiding while accepting, and it does not mean that there are no rules. Children of laid back parents are expected to make good choices, but their poor choices are not met with anger and rejection, but with the kind of understanding that can turn a bad situation into a teachable moment.

Is Laid Back Parenting for You?

Every parenting style doesn’t fit every family, obviously. If you are a very goal-oriented person, determined that your children will follow a specific path, laid back parenting may not be the right option for you. However, if your goal is to teach your children that they don’t have to be perfect to be loved, that you are there to help them make good decisions, and that you will always try to help them understand their own actions, in order to reach their goals, you may already be on the path to laid back parenting.

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